Nostalgia and the Lonely Chiquita

In the old apartment, I used to collect stickers from produce and showcase them on my cabinets for all to see. 'See! I eat a lot of vegetables and fruit! I am healthy! And the best cook ever!'

I suppose those thoughts are a bit of a stretch. Basically I just liked them because I thought they looked cool. It was a bitch to scrape all those fuckers off when we left the apartment, but lookie what we have here:



A potential love affair on my kitchen cabinet! Now, I'd be lying if I said that I didn't purposefully place them in close proximity to one another. I was trying to hook a girl up! That Squash is basically asking for it. Ms. Chiquita, with her come hither eyes and perfectly coiffed hair gazes up at Squash expectantly in all his big-lipped glory.

I know, I know what you're thinking. He doesn't look too excited about hooking up with hottie Ms. Chiquita, but there you'd be wrong.

Can you imagine banana squash hybrid babies? I would call it a squanana.

Now For Something (Kind Of) Different

Having 13 posts was annoying me.

Hello 14!

So, I am completely off the wagon. On the wagon? Off the wagon is 'bad', right? Okay, that term is just ridiculous and generally just makes me think of that ancient 'Oregon Trail' game aka: You have dystentery! Your wagon just broke an axle, bad thing, bad thing, etc etc. I guess we could say in that case its better to be off that damn wagon! I say let someone else lead the way when dystentery is involved!

Wait, where was I? Oh yeah, back to eating crap. As I sit here with a stomachache from OD of garlic knots (which should really be classified as an addictive substance. If we as a society are going to ban marijuana, I say please please PLEASE for the love of God ban the garlic knot instead! I am sure there have been just as many ill effects of the garlic knot, including mishaps from greasy hands and productivity lost from inevitable grease comas. Well, for me anyways. More on that on another post I suppose....)

Where was I again? Garlic knots. Couch. Bye bye good intentions. But, despite it all, hello size 14. Yep, I will disclose. I was rockin' the size 16 for awhile there. And truth be told the size 16 was getting a little tight. However, my size 14s now fit (Post 14, Size 14....what a coincideeeenceeee)! Yippee! Happy day! Certainly not a reason to give up this weight loss endeavor, but not a reason to let it continue to consume my writing which I am growing to love.

So, now for something (kind of) different. I have been thinking that I would like to share stories about my work as a counselor. Past and present. And oh boy I have some people I would like to bring to life in the printed word. I'm sure they can't wait to meet you. Well....of course not because I'm creating them. And believe me, those fuckers can't wait to get out of my brain and bask in their time to shine.