Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Hungry? Ask Google.


Here I sit among an ever towering skyline of boxes, so thoroughly exhausted that I'm not even sure of what I want to eat.

Of course my technologically savvy brain decided that the practical (aka: terribly lazy) thing to do would be to ask google for the answer. I've had many a satisfying experience entrusting google with important (and also sometimes quite trivial) decisions before, so I figured 'what the hey, I'll give it a whirl'. What I got was a Mad-Libs mash up of a 'hole in the bucket' type conversation I have with my boyfriend every single day:

The What-Do-You-Want-For-Dinner I-Don't-Know-What-Do-You-Want? Dialog Generator Results:
Erin: So, what do you want to eat?
Christian: I don't know what do you want to eat?
Erin: I guess I'm not really that hungry.
Christian: Yeah, me neither.
Erin: How does pasta sound?
Christian: Hmm, we have that a lot.
Erin: yeah.
Christian: So you're really not hungry?
Erin: Well, I could probably eat something.
Christian: Like what?
Erin: Just about anything, really.
Christian: How about mayo?
Erin: Yeah, I guess that's ok.
Christian: I don't know now.
Erin: You don't know? Come on.
Christian: We could order Chinese.
Erin: You're too lazy to go out and get food?
Christian: No, I guess not. Where do you want to go?
Erin: I was thinking that new pasta place.
Christian: That's all the way downtown!
Erin: It's supposed to be good.
Christian: I guess I'm just not in the mood.
Erin: Well, what are you in the mood for?
Christian: You said just about anything.
Erin: Anything but pasta.
Christian: You suggested that earlier.
Erin: I did? hmmm.
Christian: I always feel like mayo, but we never go.
Erin: That's fine..
Christian: I guess I'm just not in the mood.
Erin: Well, I could probably eat something.
Christian: We could order Chinese.
Erin: yeah.
Christian: You said just about anything.
Erin: I was thinking that new pasta place.
Christian: You suggested that earlier.
Erin: We could flip for it.
Christian: What are we arguing over?
Erin: pasta or hamburgers.
Christian: heads.
Erin: I don't have a quarter.
Christian: mayo.
Erin: Yeah, I guess that's ok.
Christian: Let's get a pizza.
Erin: Yeah, ok.
Christian: What's your favorite number?
Erin: 7.

You (yes you!) can visit this hella random website here. The results don't really vary that much, but stumbling upon this site did so delight my sleepy little mind that I wanted to share it with the world!

I am still sitting here hungry but now I can add confused to my cornicopia of moving-induced emotions. I think I'm gonna try searching yahoo instead.

Oh, and for the record I would never ever ever in a million years eat mayo. I can confidently say if it was between eating mayo or never eating again, I would choose slowly starving to my eventual demise. I don't care what anyone says, I cannot place any trust in an amorphous blob of fat that wobbles unpredictably and may very well be an alien life form planning a hostile takeover of my beloved intestinal tract.

9 comments:

  1. That is the most random use of cyber-space I have ever seen. Also, reading it really confused me.

    You should eat cereal.

    :)

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  2. What did you eat? I must know! I begin to plan my dinner around 130 in the afternoon. Otherwise it ends with me tearing apart my cupboards in a hunger frenzy!

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  3. Hahahaaaa! TB was right! TB, you're a blog psychic! I did eat some bran cereal! But then of course wasn't enough because the box was almost empty (The we-are-moving-so-cupboard-is-bare inevitablity is upon us) and who wants to say they had plain bran cereal for dinner (it didn't even have raisins! Not one!!) so Chris and I got gyros at the diner.

    Yummmmm gyros. However, my dog is recoiling in horror from my resulting tzatziki breath. Totally worth it. Also, possibly TMI. Chicken, I hope I didn't make you sorry you asked. :o)

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  4. Danny and I always have that conversation. Even if I tell him I'll make him anything he wants, we can still never decide. Sad!

    I used to know a family that would buy their mayo five gallons at a time because they ate so much of it. Gross, eh? :(

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  5. I'd like a computer program to handle all my dialogue next week. Phone calls, face to face and email would be great. I'll handle texts myself. Can you make that happen for me?

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  6. Hi Rainey. I don't mind mayo because it seems kind of slippery...like it would slip right on through I don't like things that dry into a really hard mess like pancake batter or egg yolk. I can just picture them turning my arteries into something more toothpick-like rather than straw-like. I could go for some chinese though

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  7. @MainlandStreel: I can not even wrap my brain around such a horrifying concept as a 5 gallon jar of mayo.

    @Wow, that was awkward: I'm only a lowly minion spreading the good word. Google is my information deity. You should totally ask Google for help.

    @Chicken's Consigliere: That imagery of your arteries being coated in mayo will now haunt me for days 'shudder'.

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  8. That site was so funny but I was pissed!!! I thought it was actually going to give me an answer on dinner! And I also thought that was a real conversation btwn you and chris! and I was like mayo?? Is "mayo" a new place in town I haven't heard of? AND there's a new pasta place?! Where have i been!!!!!! Grrrr.

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